Knee-Deep in the North Sea
by snakepit
Summary: Levi is a worldwide sensation; the lead singer in the band Transgender - and Eren is just a simple guy who was in the wrong place at the right time. [LeviEren. AU. Yaoi. Future Lemons.] [Side pairings: ArminAnnie, JeanMikasa, YmirKrista. Possible others.]
1. Chapter 1

1

LeviEren  
Attack on Titan ; Rated M ; Yaoi ; Lemons  
I don't own or claim to own anything but the writing.

/ **Knee-Deep in the North Sea **/

_Transgender_ was the band with the shittiest name in Union City right now, but Eren loved them to bits. He seemed like your average Joe by the way he worked part time at a grocery store and studied for his medical degree, but only few knew about his urge to get completely shitfaced on a Friday night, watching his favorite band from the front of a crowd with his closest friends. And tonight, that was exactly what he'd been doing. His sister, Mikasa had supplied them with all the booze they could drink – seeing as how she worked the night shifts on the bar, and Armin had made sure to get them their tickets for tonight. It was turning out to be an okay night for Eren, he had to admit.

"You're a lifesaver Armin!" The intoxicated brunette wrapped an arm around his sober blonde friend as they both grinned. "I never would have had the money to buy these tickets tonight!"

Armin only smiled as Eren shouted over the pumping bass in the crowded room. They had strayed away from the bar, leaving Mikasa, and found themselves at the front of the crowd.

As the introductory man got on stage and welcomed the band, he stepped aside and allowed them to pile on the stage. Eren began to cheer along with the rest of the crowd, but felt his heart stop as he realized how close he was to the lead singer.

The lead singer was named Lance, but would break your neck in two if you dared to call him that. Levi is what he went by; and Levi was always swarmed with girls, even if he openly admitted to being gay two years ago. If anything it just attracted a bigger crowd around him. So Eren; being so close, he was astonished.

_Fuck. _

He quickly dropped his beer bottle to the ground and began ruffling his grimy hair before wiping his sweaty face on his friend's shirt.

"What're you doing?!" Armin reached to touch the spot. "What did you wipe on me?!"

Before Eren could answer, Mikasa's boyfriend Jean had stumbled through the crowd and wiped his own hand across Armin's back.

"What the fuck are you guys wiping on me?!"

"Me? My faith in humanity! Just look at Eren getting all prim and proper for his man-crush!" Jean wailed laughter as Armin tugged his shirt around and inspected it with a grim expression.

"Fuck off, both of you!" Eren grimaced at his friends before standing up straight. The music that had been playing over the stereo had been turned off as the band had finished setting up their instruments.

Eren could reach out and touch the singer, but his better instinct reminded him _that's creepy_. Instead, he gawked up at the older man in astonishment. Half of him wished the singer would look down at him, and the other half wanted to duck into the crowd before he could see what a mess he was; and how gorgeous Levi was. A brow piercing was in his left eyebrow, and his right ear had been covered in hoops and a small chain that fell from the shell of his ear. Even for Eren's taste, he had never liked anything… punk. But this guy had punk written all over him; right down to the combat boots.

"Hey!" Jean shoved into Eren and wailed at the singer. Eren's face paled as the man actually looked down. He was actually looking at them. "This is your biggest fucking fan right here! He fucks himself to you almost every night."

Eren's throat compressed. He wanted to smack his sister's boyfriend or shove the bottle right up his ass for all the embarrassment that flooded over him at once. Once he was able to break his gaze away from Jean, he looked up just in time to see the singer roll his eyes and shrug them off.

_Great. _

"We're Transgender," Levi spoke monotony, but his singing was heavenly. "But you already know that."

Eren couldn't watch.

He did as his previous thoughts suggested before and ducked into the crowd, leaving a hysterical Jean with Armin. Even as the music began playing he didn't look back. He made his way back to the bar and slumped into a stool where his sister greeted him.

"Kill me." He grumbled before his forehead hit the wooden bar.

"I'm just a bartender." Mikasa retorted. "I can give you alcohol poisoning if you'd like."

Eren nodded and moments later Mikasa lined him up a row of 7 shots; all straight Gin. He lifted his face to observe the row before holding one to his nose.

"Ugh!" He pulled it away. "What percentage is this?"

"80 or so. Enough to get you shitfaced."

"Just how I like it." He snorted before tossing back the burning drink. His lips distorted into a sour frown. "Tastes like shit." He said, earning a soft laugh from her sister.

"Drink up, you've got more."

"I didn't really want alcohol poisoning you know."

"Mhm." She hummed in response before glancing at his full shot glasses. With a sigh, he slowly began downing them all one by one – and eventually, the soft singing from Levi was all that echoed in his ears before an hour had passed and the concert was over.

"Eren where were you?" Armin pouted before scooting into the stool next to Eren.

The brunette scowled as Jean came behind the bar and wrapped an arm around his sister.

"Dying." He replied before face planting the bar again.

"What?" Armin giggled a bit. "Are you drunk?"

"I'm so sober, Armin… it almost hurts." He truthfully admitted to everyone's surprise.

"Why don't we head next door?" Mikasa offered. "They're playing strip poker and the winner keeps all of the biddings."

"Sounds fun." Armin chimed and Eren shrugged.

"I don't want anyone to see you naked!" Jean drunkenly admitted.

"Are you saying I'm going to lose?" She asked and Jean silenced. "You'll be the only naked one tonight." She added as she collected her purse and took off her apron. Eren and Armin quietly chuckled as Jean pouted.

"Come on." Mikasa led the way across the street to the bar next door. Downtown, it wasn't unusual to see bars stacked on top of one another. Usually it was all about the gigs anyway, and who you wanted to see live. So anywhere that Transgender had gone, Eren had gone. Luckily tonight though, the bar was nearly empty besides their few friends.

Connie and Sasha were just setting up the table as they all walked in.

"Hey! You guys made it." Sasha offered them all a smile before they took their seats.

"Of course." Mikasa pulled out the whiskey bottle from her purse.

"Oh," Connie deadpanned. "A friend of ours is coming. She just moved here, so I hope you guys don't mind."

"What's her name? Is she hot?" Jean murmured and smirked to Mikasa who hadn't paid any attention. He pouted at the rejection.

"Her name is Annie, and er… she's… something else." Connie slowly spoke before bashfully laughing.

"Something else?" Jean and Armin asked at the same time just as the door opened.

A short blonde girl stood alongside another short blonde; one they knew, the other was a stranger to them. Krista, their usual short blonde girl, stepped in and took her seat with her girlfriend Ymir. While the stranger didn't take her eyes from the ground as she seated between Connie and Sasha.

"This is Annie!" Sasha beamed and threw an arm around the girl.

Everyone waved shortly as she offered an obviously fake and thin smile.

"So!" Krista picked up the deck of cards and handed them to Ymir who began shuffling them. "Strip poker tonight?"

Everyone agreed as they all pulled out their own chips. Eren had grumbled most of the game as it started off slow, but as it began to pick up speed, and the emptier his wallet was getting, he found himself getting more intoxicated with laughing than drinking.

Mikasa had been stripped of her shirt; Jean of his pants, shirt and shoes; Ymir fully clothed; Krista without pants; Armin without a shirt and shoes; Sasha without a shirt and, being as confident as she is, without a bra; and Connie without anything but his boxers…

Along with Eren. He had been stripped of everything of his boxers, and his blush was growing painfully strong by the time he had folded.

"Off with your trunks, Eren!" Sasha giggled through her influenced slur.

He shook his head and crossed his legs before covering his face with his hands. This just wasn't his night, and it got even worse when Sasha and Jean had leapt across the poker table to hold him down and forcefully strip him of his underwear.

He quickly tried to cover himself as he fallen to the floor.

"Fuck! You guys!" He looked up to his group of friends who all stared quietly behind him.

_Oh no. _

He fell onto his back and his eyes widened at the man standing right above him, looking down on him. If he thought his face couldn't stain darker, he was wrong. His face was a bright ruby red.

Levi was seen above him, staring down at him with the most uninterested expression before embarrassingly stating, "Cute cock."

Eren stumbled to his feet and couldn't believe what he was hearing and seeing – he couldn't bear the feeling that was overcoming him. Embarrassment, regret and the sudden urge to jump off of the nearest building all overcame him at once before emerald eyes rolled back and his body fell limp against the floor.

Everyone's eyes widened, even Levi's.

"What happened?" Sasha broke the silence.

A ginger girl that had been on Levi's arm knelt over and placed a finger to Eren's pulse before answering with a short giggle, "He fainted."

* * *

Eren woke up slowly. He curled into fetal position, holding his head in his hands and groaning through his fingers before finally remembering the night before. With his breath hitched, he glanced from under his hands and to the familiar livingroom that was Armin's. He exhaled a breath of relief at that, and the fact that his clothes had been replaced. Then, disappointment that he had been so close to Levi, to meeting his role model… and he blew it.

He pulled his phone out and glanced to the time, which was 4 in the morning. He had never been a pro at getting a good night's of sleep, but luckily for him he woke up 5 hours early for work. Which would be just enough time to get rid of this hangover.

Armin wouldn't mind if he used his shower, so he did.

He peeled his clothes off that had been stained with beer, sweat and Gods know what the hell else.

With an internal groan, he tried to keep himself from remembering last night. Instead, he showered quickly, wrapped a towel around his waist and felt his way through the darkness and into Armin's room for some fresh work clothes. Again, he knew Armin wouldn't mind.

Carefully, he felt for the lamp on Armin's dresser and flipped it on.

He figured it wasn't best to look back at his sleeping friend; already experiencing enough mistakes of doing that before to know that Armin sleeps naked. Instead, he pulled open the drawers and started rummaging for clothes.

"Who're you?" Came a female voice.

He halted, froze and stopped breathing before turning and facing blonde hair and blue eyes. At first, he had thought it was Armin, until he squinted and saw the obvious and uncovered breasts of this stranger.

"U-uh!" He covered his eyes. "I'm Eren, nice to meet you!" He stupidly blurted out before cursing himself for the dumb greeting. "I'm just looking for clothes, I'm Armin's friend." He corrected before peeking between his fingers – the girl was still uncovered, rather standing up on her feet and completely bare.

"Eren," this time it was Armin's voice. "Oh, jeez."

Eren lowered his hands, trying to look at his friend rather than the naked stranger in the middle of the room. Armin was under the sheets, bashfully smiling with a blush on his cheeks that could be darker than the blush on Eren's face.

"This is Annie, from poker." Armin said.

"Cool – awesome," Eren quickly disregarded the introduction. "I was just getting some clothes."

"Oh, right." Armin held the blanket between his legs before pointing to a drawer. "Some of my work clothes are in that drawer."

Eren took the guidance and quickly selected a shirt and pants before muttering a '_thanks_' to Armin and a '_nice to meet you_' to the naked girl still standing and watching him. Once he shut the door behind him, he heaved a deep and long sigh of relief before jogging to the bathroom again and quickly changing.

It was needless to say he felt uncomfortable in Armin's house now. Instead of waiting the next 4 hours for work to begin or someone to pick him up, he left and started walking in the darkness of what wasn't even morning yet. The sky was still dark but birds were still chirping, roads were busy with people trying to make it to work and the chill of the morning hadn't yet worn off.

The train station was his destination at the moment. To get on the train and make it downtown to Union Grocery where he'd spend 6 hours taking care of rude, ungrateful customers until he could come home to his rude and ungrateful neighbors and his lonely apartment complex. Either that or another night of drinking with rude and ungrateful friends.

He shook his head, finally reaching the station.

The only light was that of a dim streetlights beside the station and the horizon's rising sun, making the sky blend pinks and yellows in front of him, and behind him was still purely pitch black and night. Only another hour and the sun would rise, and only 30 more minutes until the next train comes. He disregarded the footsteps getting closer and stopping next to him – instead he stared at his feet and let his head hang as he tried to remember last night before slumping into the nearest bench. Every time he remembered the bland expression on Levi's face it made him wince a little bit harder.

He looked up to check the neon numbers. 15 minutes.

Unintentionally, he glanced over to the shadow standing next to him – and the shadow was standing on one combat-booted foot, the other pressed to the wall behind him with a cigarette between his lips. They were wearing a black hoodie with the hood pulled over their shaggy black hair. It wasn't until Eren's eyes traced down onto the slim legs and familiar glimmer of an eyebrow piercing did he realize – Levi was standing right next to him, and now he was looking down at him.

Blue met green in a flash before Eren quickly turned away.

"Oh hey," Levi mused, both of his feet coming to the ground with a thud. "You're that cock kid."

Eren grumbled, "Cock kid?"

The ravenette shrugged before dropping his cigarette to the ground. Eren watched his movements as he smothered the cigarette with the heel of his boot, listened to the chains on his pants jingle while he walked and almost fell into the warmth that sat beside him. He caught himself just as he started lulling.

"You okay?" Levi crossed his legs, raising a brow. "You're not going to faint, are you?"

"I'm fine." Eren said a little more ill-mannered than he'd hoped. "I'm just tired."

"Why? You were the first to pass out."

"Can we not talk about that?"

A soft chuckle, barely audible and unshown on the ravenette's face – and yet Eren had heard it and relished in it – the first time he had ever heard Levi laugh. In every documentary of their band, every interview or live appearance, he had never heard him laugh. And now, the realization sat in that here he was, sitting with the lead singer of his favorite band at an isolated train station. He hadn't completely blown it, for the most part.

"Where are you headed?" Levi snaps his fingers when Eren doesn't answer him and repeats the question when green eyes meet his.

"U-uh… I was going to work."

Levi tsked. "Why?"

Brunette brows furrowed. "To survive? – You know, not everyone can be a big rock star."

"Not unless you want to be."

Eren drew a breath to protest, but exhaled it before rolling his eyes and instead asking, "What about you – where are you headed?"

"Back to my hotel," he answers. "We leave in 3 days to go back to Canada."

"Oh." Eren must have made the disappointment a little too obvious.

"Want to come?"

"What?"

"Back to the hotel with me – you sound heartbroken that we're leaving." Levi says and chuckles again as he adds in, "Besides, your friend said you wank to me every night."

"W-wait," Eren stutters. "You're just… inviting me to fuck you?"

Levi raises a brow. "You think I'm that easy?"

He stammers a bit, his brows knitted and defensive until all the muscles in his body come to a complete halt and he registers the comment. Then, again, he gets defensive, "Don't turn the tables!"

Levi opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by the horn of the train before neither of them could have heard one another – in fact neither of them made an attempt to talk over the screeching of the train coming to a halt. They stared at each other until silence fell again.

"So," Levi stood. "You coming, or not?"

The answer was a gamble.

Yes – and lose his job. Lose his job, lose rent money. Lose rent money, lose his apartment. Lose his apartment, move back in with Mikasa. Move back in with Mikasa, face the awkward game nights with Jean and Marco cheering and drunk.

The plus side was free beer, he sarcastically noted to himself.

But if he chose yes, he'd also get to spend a night with Levi. _Levi fucking Rivaille_. The man that men _and_ women of all ages would so much as to kill to spend a day with. The thought alone almost made him wonder why he was even debating about this. Who knows what would happen if he were alone with Levi? Some things he had even dreamed of could come true right now.

He mentally pictured himself sitting here, motionless, pondering a question that didn't _need_ pondering.

Eren looked for some kind of answer in those tired blue eyes; that _failed to impress_ expression that always stuck so well defined with everything about Levi. From the vulnerable tendons in his neck that Eren had dreamed of running his tongue along, to the soft skin on his collarbones that he would graze his teeth across before revealing just what was underneath that baggy ass tank top.

"We don't have all day." Levi interrupted his thoughts.

If he chose no, there's no telling what he would be missing out on tonight.

Maybe one night was worth it all.

"Fine," Eren huffed before standing to his feet. "I'll come with you."

He mentally slapped himself back into motion after Levi cocked his brow and tried to hide the fact that he half smiled. It was like an accomplishment to Eren.

_Achievement unlocked: made Levi half smile._

He smiled to himself and followed the ravenette onto the train where they both paid for their ticket and sat in the very back at the corner. The train was brightly lit while the outside was still dim and the sky was warped with electrifying yellow and bruised underneath with purple.

He wanted to speak, to turn to the man and spark up a conversation – he was good at that most of the time. But the heaviness of sleep underneath his eyes was wearing him down more and more every second and with a soft yawn, he placed his head against the window and glanced over to the ravenette lost somewhere in thought, staring out of the opposite window. He admired the view; a celebrity, a singer, a famous person so close to him, interacting with him. It was lovely, and he had to admit the singer looked better up close.

With a slight smile, his eyes finally fell closed.

He felt lucky for this.

* * *

Krista woke up early, as always.

The earliest of mornings were always nicer – the way the chill still lingered in the gusting winter winds, the way the trees bent and twisted against said wind and the way that the sky was so crystal clear without a cloud in sight; and yet it was so cold. It was almost like a dream that she hadn't woken up from.

It was all there was to enjoy until Ymir's friends showed up.

She liked Bertolt. He was quiet, shy and always polite. Never once had he gotten in the way and sometimes he'd even help her around the house while Reiner and Annie sat rudely with Ymir.

It wasn't that she didn't like Ymir's friends, they were just… _rude_. They were rude to her and rude to Ymir – she didn't understand why her girlfriend was friends with such people, but she never made an attempt to tell her that. Ymir was good to her, and so long as she was good to her she didn't care who Ymir brought home… as long as they weren't too drunk to know what was happening, of course. Again.

This morning, she left the balcony of her apartment and answered the loud banging at their front door. It was Reiner, and behind him stood Bertolt. She offered the sweetest smile she could, even if it was fake, before stepping aside and inviting them in.

"Ymir is asleep but –"

"I'll wake her up." Reiner waved her attempt away and roughly brushed past her.

She stammered a bit before silencing herself and sighing. She shook her head in an attempt to stifle her anger and tied her pretty blonde hair up before making her way towards the kitchen and flipping on the switch to her faithful coffee pot.

"Would you like a cup?" She smiled to the nervous brunette who had just finished wiping his feet before stepping in and closing the door. Polite, as always – she liked that.

He returned the smile before nodding. "Yeah, please."

_Please_. Finally, someone in this house says please.

"One cup of coffee, coming right up," she sweetly spoke. "If you don't mind…" her voice trailed off as she bashfully giggled, covering her mouth so ladylike before pointing to the pantry. Being 6 feet tall, Bertolt didn't hesitate in happily helping the short blonde.

From the hallway came Ymir's groan. "_Fuck you_." She sarcastically sneered.

"Saw your cousin on the train with that twink from earlier," Reiner seemed to have ignored her insult. "Think Levi's gonna trash him, too?"

Ymir collected her thoughts before asking, "Twink?"

"Yeah," he shrugged. "The one you sent me a picture of – passed out on the floor with his dick hanging out."

She barked a laugh, "Oh, Eren!"

Krista listened in from over the kitchen counter with Bertolt as they silently sipped their coffee. She couldn't help but to feel a strange pang of irritation with Reiner's choice of words. Eren was a nice guy, after all… why were they so mean?

"Nah, I dunno." Ymir finally answered. "Levi isn't the type to stick around for long."

"Think Eren knows that?" Reiner asked, taking a seat on the sofa Krista had just cleaned and propping his dusty shoes on top of the coffee table that she had just dusted. She chewed the inside of her mouth and watched the bum of a man chatter on.

"Doubt it." Ymir admitted. "It's not like he tells them when he takes them back to bed."

"That's the life of a rock star for you, I guess."

Krista huffed before calling from the kitchen, "I think you should warn him."

Ymir looked back with her brows knitted. "Why?"

"Because Eren is a nice guy, and he's our friend," Krista saw the shrug already forming on Ymir's shoulders. "Levi is a nice guy too, but I don't think he understands just how much Eren really likes him."

"Krista," Ymir tsked. "We _all_ know how much of a fan boy Eren is over Levi. Maybe this is good for him."

She opened her mouth to argue with that but Reiner cut in, "Yeah, Krista – listen to your girlfriend. She knows best after all." He winked to Ymir as they shared some kind of childhood laughter that absolutely riled Krista.

"Hey," Bertolt softly nudged her and offered a reassuring smile followed by silence. It's all she needed to sigh through her nose and return to sipping her coffee. Instead of listening to the further babble of Ymir and Reiner, she brushed past the two and returned to the balcony, only now happy to have the company of Bertolt. Even if he was quiet and distant, he was a breath of fresh air.

* * *

Levi's head rose with attention that the train had come to a stop – their stop. He could see the hotel's top floor in the distance, the balcony that he'd be relaxing on as soon as they stepped into that hotel. Now, the sun was completely risen and for a split second Levi felt a pang of guilt for not telling the kid that he had taken him out of the city. But Mikasa had talked to him the night before, the night they were at the bar.

"_You're Eren's biggest inspiration," she said. "I know it must not mean much to you, but it means a lot to him."_

_Tch_; he was getting soft.

"Hey, kid." Levi nudged the sleeping brunette and had to stifle a dry laugh when Eren's head hit the window and he came alive at impact. "Sorry." He quickly muttered before biting his lip. The expression on Eren's face of complete bewilderment almost cracked Levi.

Almost.

Green eyes squinted at the bright sunlight and he held a hand up to better look at Levi. He stared at him for moments to reassure himself this wasn't a dream, and when he was finally content with believing himself, he rubbed his head and rose from the seat with a stretch.

Levi got up with him and walked to the front of the train, confident that Eren would follow him.

Which he did.

They stepped off of the train and Levi immediately tugged his hoodie back over his head and pulled a pair of sunglasses from his pants pockets before sliding them on. He looked to Eren, and even though the brunette couldn't read his eyes, he seemed to know exactly what Levi was saying.

The walk to the hotel was short, considering it was only a block away, but there were _crazy_ fans surrounding his hotel and to get into the lobby a couple of oversized bodyguards had to physically make an entry for them.

Levi had held Eren's hand and pulled him through the crowd. It was mind numbing for Eren and he felt as if his legs would have failed him at any moment just for the simple contact. Something as innocent as their hands touching just made Eren absolutely lose it and his heart raced with excitement. But the moment was over as soon as it started, and as they stumbled into the lobby Levi broke their hands.

Levi sighed and caught his breath while Eren marveled the enormous stone room. He couldn't even begin to imagine what the rooms looked like – or how much it would even cost to stay in a place like this. And he wasn't dare going to ask.

"Room's this way," Levi said as he walked towards an elevator.

Eren followed silently, still observing the room with awe. He barely notices when the elevator dings and a few people pile out before Levi snaps his attention back and they're getting onto the small elevator.

In this moment Eren wanders _why_, and thinks aloud, "What are we doing here?"

Levi looks up, "Whatever you want to do."

"_Eren lost a lot when he was younger; he needs something to… revive him."_

Mikasa confided into Levi last night. After Eren passed out, after Levi had helped her dress him and noticed the freckle below his navel; almost thinking it was cute – almost thinking that the brunette was entirely cute. The way that his bottom lip pouted as he slept and his eyes occasionally twisted in his sleep while he pawed at the nothingness on his cheek.

Okay, it _was_ cute.

"_When our mother died… Eren kind of died with her."_

"I don't care," Eren bashfully smiled before twiddling a curl of chocolate hair. "I mean, I'm already with the coolest person in the world." He finished with a soft chuckle.

"_I'm not forcing you to be friends with him, just know he's a good friend. You'd be lucky to have him, and he obviously wants you as a friend."_

Levi slipped the glasses off before blue met green and Eren's smile nervously faded.

Levi faced the ground as the two listened to the repetitive beeping of each floor passing by until they had finally made it to the 12th floor – their stop. Levi got off first and lead the brunette down a long hallway until they made it to room B13.

Levi sighed when he faced the door and steadied his nervous hand when sliding the keycard into its slot. He mentally cursed himself. He had never been so nervous when bringing someone back to his room before – he had never felt guilty for using anyone and kicking them out the next morning. But now, the thought of using this kid and booting him out the morning after… it made his stomach lurch.

Eren, with anxiety, watched as Levi swung the door open and stepped aside to allow him entry that he skittishly took. The room was huge – complete with a view of the city overhead. Downtown, where all of the skyscrapers reflected off of the sun and people scurried around like ants from this view. If it were any other time, Eren would have been terrified with such heights – but with Levi, it seemed alright.

"It's, wow." Eren finally muttered.

The bed was nearly half the side of the room and still a mess from where Levi had slept some odd nights before. One single plastic bottle of whiskey sat on the TV stand, and on the nightstand was an ashtray filled with crumpled cigarette butts.

"Sit," Levi offered and waved a hand nonchalantly at the bed.

Eren complied and sat on the edge of the bed where Levi met beside him. Eren watched him, stared at him and waited – and Levi even waited for himself to kick back into gear.

Was this really happening? Levi couldn't fathom the idea of why he was hesitating; since when did he care? This was supposed to be the part where he leans in and pins the kid down, grinds and drives him absolutely mad until he completely satisfies himself and then tells the person to beat it.

But something about Eren.

"I'm a sucker for green eyes," Levi blurts out and isn't even quite sure himself why he said it.

Eren's ears highlight red though as he fidgets with his hands between his knees.

Levi sighs, finally giving up after moments of silence before he stands and strips himself of his baggy jacket, strips himself of a grimy tank top and turns to face Eren once he finally unbuttons his pants. All Eren could do was stare with his jaw partially dropped and if he had half the sense right now he'd curse himself for his face burning so hot.

"You're pretty awkward, kid." Levi cocks his brow and Eren still remains silent. "Stop staring at me like that." His lip curls as he holds his arms over his chest and crawls into the bed.

Brunette brows furrow in confusion as he turns around and watches Levi removing his pants underneath the covers. Levi picks up on the confusion and answers, "I'm tired – you're tired. Let's just sleep. We'll figure out what we're doing when we wake up."

Eren nods, slightly coming back to reality. He slowly peels off his own shirt and blushes a deeper shade of crimson at his lack of tone in his body compared to Levi.

Levi doesn't seem to mind though, and it reassures Eren enough when Levi doesn't bother to stare and instead focuses on lighting the cigarette between his lips.

Skittishly and hesitantly, Eren slips underneath the blankets and every nerve in his body comes alive when Levi's arm just simply brushes across him. His body covers in goose bumps and his hands already feel hot and sweaty.

Levi watches him from the corner of his eyes while he finishes his cigarette. It's still undecided what will happen next. Why did he have to start caring now? Why this kid? This cute ass kid lying almost naked in bed with him.

"Turn off your phone," Levi mumbles before rolling over. "I'll break it if it wakes me up."

Eren nods even though Levi can't see him and pulls his phone out from his pocket. It was already silenced for work, and he had 3 missed calls from Krista – weird. He brushed it off and shut his phone off completely before setting it on the bed stand next to him.

He wasn't sure if he could even fall asleep under these conditions, but with a content sigh he rolled onto his side and stared at the soft heaving of Levi's breathing. Of course the ravenette drifted off before him; there was no telling how long he had gone without sleep. And Eren didn't mind a bit to take this time to admire every last detail of the singer. The small tattoos on Levi's fingers, the piercings on his brow and ears, the way his muscles creased in his stomach and arms. Everything right down to the pattern of his breathing and his lashes fluttering every so often.

He smiled to himself before nuzzling the pillow that smelled of Levi before sleep overcame him again.

* * *

Author Notes; Tell me your predictions of what you think will happen next; I love it when people do that~

Fun fact: I rewrote this chapter 6 times before I finally was content with it.

Ugh. I was supposed to do my History final tonight, but I just got carried away with writing and rewatching Lord of the Rings until now, around 8 AM, while I'm uploading this. I'm so screwed omfg. I need sleep.

If you guys can't tell, I love Bertolt. I ship him with anything bc he's such a cutie gosh.


	2. Chapter 2

*I know what you're thinking – _"Darling, the story is about Eren and Levi, why are you bringing Armin into this?" _I promise you it's vital and if you want to skip it, you _can_ – but you'll miss out on some key factors. Also, I'm really shit at writing lyrics – so any songs in the story will be cited at the end.

I really like this chapter – I spent a lot of time on it. It uncovers a lot of things that will be coming into play soon and I kind of like how I made Levi's past – which you'll fully uncover, along with Eren's, soon enough~

Also! Early update because I finished my classes and I want my **break**. Anyway, consider it a Christmas gift I guess. Merry early Christmas!

* * *

2

LeviEren  
Attack on Titan ; Rated M ; Yaoi ; Lemons  
I don't own or claim to own anything but the writing.

/ **Knee-Deep in the North Sea** /

It was 2 PM, and Armin was late for work. He knew that but the warm temptation of a blond girls arms threw any common sense right out of the window and he nestled closer to the girl he only knew as Annie. He didn't know her last name, where she was from or even her age – other than she was of legal drinking age, so he had no worries. Besides, she had no idea who he even was.

But there was a question ringing in his ears: Would this be another one night stand?

Another morning followed by tense chatter and then the piercing silence of the morning shifting into afternoon with no one's company but himself. She would just be another pretty face to avoid on the streets. Mikasa warned him a long time ago of his habit – of his fear to get attached to anyone. It had happened years ago when he and Krista were a thing, before she went through her whole transition into the blossoming profile of a lesbian. He was her experiment to find out that fact and it hurt like a bitch. They used to be inseparable; always hand in hand, always on the phone, always dating. That lasted for two years.

And now another blond-hair-blue-eyes laid naked in his arms.

He didn't want to leave her sleepy grasp, but he couldn't bear the tormenting question anymore. He prepared himself for the worst and carefully slipped out from under her head and arm, out of bed and into some sweat pants and a baggy white t-shirt before he blinked the sleep out of his eyes and made his way to the kitchen. Coffee was boiling in the pot already; probably Eren's doing – which he noticed the brunette wasn't in his home any longer. There wasn't much anyone else to talk to this about. Everyone but Eren always gave him the same answer: "You need to open up more."

But Armin didn't want to. He enjoyed being alone – he enjoyed the simple life style that his friends hadn't adopted. To pour his every emotion into fables and stories, to get attached to the places he's never been and pinpoint on the map poster every place he's ever gone – which wasn't many places. He was born in France, and he spent his short 23 years traveling America. Arizona, New York and Boston were the only three places he had gone before he had to return back to France with Eren and Mikasa to accompany him through their familiar vacations in the boring towns.

With a sigh, he drifted from the cold kitchen floor and onto the warm carpet of his livingroom. Above the bookshelf is where that said map was located; and with only those three tacks placed. He wanted to go to Canada – where he was originally supposed to go before Eren called him home when his mum died. He couldn't have just said no to coming home for them.

Giving up his dreams for his friends; it might have been worth it – worth all the one night stands; all the empty and lonely mornings and dusty books collecting in every corner of his apartment.

As if on cue Annie came stumbling out of the hallway, tripping and stumbling over a few books that were stacked against the hallways wall. Armin immediately set his coffee down and helped the girl up before stammering out a few apologies.

Damn it, this was embarrassing. Why couldn't they just leave before he woke up?

"Thanks." She muttered and rubbed her sore knees. She was only dressed in one of his sweaters and Armin hoped she had some panties on underneath it.

He hummed an affirmative tone and once they both stood flat on their feet he asked, "Want a cup of coffee?" In some hopes to release some of the tension slowly creeping from the walls.

Annie pursed her lips before nodding. "Sure."

Armin slightly smiled before brushing past her and returning with a cup. In his short absence, she was back on the floor with her legs crossed – thankfully wearing panties – and with her bangs tucked behind her ear, she was observing one of his older books.

She took the cup without looking up.

"You like to read?" He asked before getting his own cup and meeting her on the floor.

"Well," she turned the book over to reveal its cover. It was _Medical Mistakes by Eth Leonhart_. "My father was a writer – this is one of his books. I read it at least a million times when I was a kid."

Armin gaped. "Your dad is Eth Leonhart? Wow." So her last name was Leonhart – he noted that.

"Yeah." She absently said as she cracked the book open. It was dusty, that was for sure. It was definably one of the books Armin hadn't opened in a long time and had just stacked away for his collection. But he remembered reading the book when he wanted to be a doctor – he read a lot of Leonhart's books when he was in college, in fact.

Which he told her, "I read a lot of his books when I wanted to be a doctor."

She looked as if she was about to laugh. "Yeah, he taught me a lot of this garbage. Believe it or not I was one of his test subjects once upon a time." She glanced up at him before closing the book. "Forget I said that – sorry."

"N-no wait, I'd love to hear –"

"I really should be going."

She said those words and it struck Armin down. "Wait!" He called out as she stood to her feet and turned. She didn't listen, she simply went back into the bedroom and he followed her to watch her curvy hips swinging back and forth as she tugged her jeans back on. Just as she was about to take his sweater off, he grabbed a hold of her wrist.

They stared at each other for seconds before Annie sourly asked, "What?"

"Keep the sweater," He forced a smile. "It looks nice on you."

And it did – really. It was one of his baby blue cashmere sweaters that he used to wear when he went to college. Everyone told him he looked like a doctor in it, so at the time it was his favorite. But on Annie it was something else. It was charming, and Armin hated to use the word sexy, but… it was. The neck of the sweater dipped with her collarbones and clung to her thin figure – plus the colors matched with her profile more than it did his; so he thinks.

She looked down at herself before muttering, "Okay."

He nodded and let go of her wrist, allowing her to brush back past him and to the front door where he silently followed her.

She held the doorknob and turned to face him. "I'll bring it back after I wash it."

He began to argue, until it clicked in his head that this was an excuse to see her again.

Again, he smiled. "I'll be here."

* * *

Eren rubbed his eyes as he sat up. A part of him wasn't surprised to find the bed empty, but the other half of him couldn't help but to get a bit disappointed. It's not like the ravenette had gone far – Eren could clearly see him standing on the balcony with a cigarette between his lips. He looked as if he were enjoying the view of downtown; or thinking, maybe. Eren wondered what he was pondering so hard about.

Almost as if Levi had felt Eren's eyes on him, he turned around and faced those green eyes behind the glass door. With a breathy curse, Levi turned back to the shading town in front of him.

He couldn't deal with this right now – he didn't need some brat coming into his life and making him question his morals. Better yet, he didn't need to _feel_ again. He had already had his fair share of hurt from his ex; going through it again was not an option – and _damn_. He swore again for even considering that as an option.

"_What a famous fuck Rivaille was!" He overheard his ex cackling with her friends. "He went on about some sappy shit, saying he'd love me forever – like, come on! What a pussy. As if I'd want some fucked up lunatic to be mine forever."_

He winced.

As he was flicking his cigarette butt off of the balcony, the brunette was sliding between the glass doors and met him with a look that seemed to say a million things that Levi couldn't even begin to imagine what it meant – all he knew was right now the kid was pissing him off with those big fucking eyes.

What was this feeling? – Guilt? He had nothing to be guilty for… yet.

_I could just confide to him_, Levi thought foolishly before smiting himself again.

"Are you okay?" Eren finally mumbled so quietly Levi barely heard him.

_Fuck this kid for caring. _

"You need to leave." Levi dryly spit out without looking up at Eren.

"Wha –"

"Did I stutter? I said leave."

"_You're Eren's biggest inspiration. I know it must not mean much to you, but it means a lot to him."_

Like he cared – Eren was just another fan.

There was a soft exhale of air that Eren had drawn and Levi took that as a sign that Eren wouldn't argue; and he was thankful that he didn't. Yet he made the mistake of looking to his side, to those downfallen emeralds and the frown tugging on Eren's usual smiling lips. He couldn't stop staring at the kid, and the unfamiliar feeling of wanting to apologize overcame him. He tucked it away.

Eren wouldn't even look up at him – because he knew this would happen. The moment he saw Levi's figure at the train station, he knew this would be an unlasting moment. The worst part was that he had nothing to argue with. Levi invited him over, Levi told him to leave.

And Levi hated himself right now.

But Eren made him think thoughts he didn't want to think. He couldn't let himself get hurt again – it wasn't about putting people before himself anymore. So when Eren turned on his heels and collected his shirt and phone from the bed, Levi simply watched him from the corner of the eye until the door shut in his departure.

* * *

Eren swallowed the thick lump collecting in his throat but no matter how harshly he tried, it wouldn't go down. He was going to cry – he knew it. His eyes burned and his chest was heaving unsteadily.

No, he couldn't cry. He couldn't.

_Can't, can't, can't_, he repeated the word in his head like a mantra.

With trembling hands, he smoothened his shirt and hair before pulling his phone out and turning it back on. While he waited for the elevator he checked his messages – 4 unread.

_Krista  
I need to tell you something important… call me back soon ok?_

_Armin  
Remember that girl? …I need to talk to you about her._

_Armin  
Sorry for texting again but I really need you right now. Meet me at Queen's Café if you got the time._

_Mikasa  
Where are you? Armin said you left before he woke up and you're not at work. I'm worried about you. How's your head? Are you okay?_

5 missed calls from Mikasa, 3 missed calls from Krista and 1 missed call from Armin. He quickly texted Mikasa that he was safe and left out the details of Levi as he stepped onto the elevator.

_I got some breakfast – my head is okay. I'll call you later tonight._

What a lie that was. Right now his head _was_ throbbing and he wasn't sure if it was because of the night before when he hit his head, or because of the pangs of burn in his eyes from the tears he kept blinking back repeatedly. Right now what he needed to do was focus on who to call back first – Krista, or Armin – and Gods was that an awkward decision.

Armin would be pissed at him for choosing Krista first.

As the phone rang he glared back at the empty hallway. The swirls in the carpet that led onto the end of the hallway where Levi's room sat, he could just easily barge back in there… and yet…

The elevator doors closed, and Krista answered with a soft, "Hello?"

* * *

3 days was all Levi had – 3 days until he goes back to Canada with his band mates. Was that enough time to sort out this Eren ordeal? Was there even anything to sort out? He questioned that as he laid back onto his bed and stared up at the ceiling. He didn't like being alone, but he was too familiar with it now to change that. He was going to be alone, he would live and die alone and he came to accept that.

"_You're so fucking bitter! How does anyone put up with you?"_

Ymir had said that to him – with reason. It was after Ymir's parents died and she had to move in with Levi. Considering the fact that she was 12 at the time, and Levi was 20. That was 8 years ago though and now they were on better ground, even though it was obvious her opinion still hadn't changed. He was still the same bitter prick that he was to her years ago.

"_If only they knew how bitter you were."_

A girl he knew once said that to him in reference to his cheering fans. Zoe was her name, if he recalled correctly. She had been joking when she said it; in fact she was one of the few women who would put up with his bullshit back in the day, but he knew she meant it. His own mother hadn't even wanted anything to do with him, and that's exactly why he had ended up in this exact spot.

This is why he was used to empty hotels.

This is why he was bitter.

And when the hours passed, he was on stage again – another night, another one night stand and he scanned the audience for just the right prey. There were girls and men, women and boys, and yet none of them were appealing to him.

"_In a foreign place, the saving grace was the feeling. That it was a heart that he was stealing. Oh he was ready to impress and the fierce excitement. The eyes are bright he couldn't wait to get away; I bet the Juliet was just the icing on the cake. Make no mistake – no_," Levi mused into the microphone.

He didn't want to be here – and he never wants to be on stage, but tonight the will to leave was much stronger.

"_And even if somehow we could have shown you the place you wanted – well I'm sure you could have made it that bit better on your own. And I bet she told a million people that she'd stay in touch, well all the little promises they don't mean much_."

He was distant – and he knew exactly why.

"_When there are memories to be made. And I hope you're holding hands by New Year's Eve. They made it far too easy to believe that true romance can't be achieved these days."_

He was a hypocrite for singing these words – and not only he knew it. Those green eyes in the very back of the room had retold the word "_hypocrite_" written all over them. Levi could see the expression from the stage. He could see Eren's lip curl in a snarl that seemed to ask, 'Why _this_ song, of all songs?'

"_And even if somebody could have shown you the place you wanted. Well I sure you could have made it that bit better on your own. You are the only ones who know_."

And Levi finished the song with a look back that seemed to ask, 'Why are you even here?'

Or so he thought. Eren didn't seem to send anymore telepathic messages. He only scowled and turned away, facing back to his friends. A blonde girl that Levi had already met – it was his cousin's girlfriend, and she was sitting with another tall brunette boy. None of them looked happy to see Levi showing up at the same bar twice, but little did they know it was all intentional. He knew Eren was here, he knew why.

So why this song, of all songs?

* * *

"I'm sorry he did that to you, Eren." Krista shook her head and glanced up to the ravenette on stage. He was just spinning on his heels, shooting their table one last glance before he disappeared behind the curtains with the rest of the band.

"It's not your place to apologize," Eren sadly smiled. "Besides, I finally got to literally sleep with the _famous Levi_." He bit the end of his sentence off with sarcasm. "I lost my job for it."

"God…" Krista put her head in her hands. "I should have called you sooner."

Eren rejected her sympathy again with a stiff smile and sniffled before taking another sip on his shot of cinnamon vodka. He held it down with a slight scrunch of his expression and cleared his sore throat. Right now, he felt foolish for crying over someone he never even had a shot with. It was almost like crying for someone who never existed – and yet he had been crying all day.

"And fuck him for coming to your sisters bar," Bertolt threw in quietly.

It threw both Krista and Eren off hard enough to earn a laugh from both of them.

"And he speaks!" Krista playfully cheered.

"So why didn't Ymir come with you?" Eren finally asked the question he had been wondering this whole time.

Unknowingly, Krista left out the insults her and Reiner spoke earlier, "She is just hanging out with Reiner again." Also not wanting to insult Bertolt's best friend, she left it at that and smiled dryly to Eren who seemed to accept in dropping it.

Levi interrupted at this point, making his presence completely known by slumping into the vacant seat next to Krista. He earned a scowl from all three of them.

"Eren," he ignored the other two. "I want to talk to you."

Eren looked to Krista for some kind of answer, but her eyes said nothing. Bertolt glared at him as if to send him a warning omen. He didn't know how to respond other than to look down at his glass.

"I don't want to talk." He quietly admitted even though it was a lie.

"I don't care." Levi retorted, earning a shocked expression from Eren. "I want to talk to you."

Krista butted in, "So talk."

"Alone – with Eren." He corrected and she shook her head.

"We're all friends here." She crossed her arms, determined.

He tsked. "Forget it."

When Levi rose from his seat, Eren instinctively rose from his own and stammered for a second before finally breathing the word, "Fine." He looked down at the ravenette who appeared emotionless.

Krista and Bertolt looked to Eren now for some kind of reasoning, but Eren was too caught up in Levi's gaze to notice the two staring up at him. So Krista and Bertolt quietly watched Levi pull Eren away and stay against the walls, in the shadows and away from the crowd until they were somewhere backstage and out of their sight.

Krista sighed at the departure but Bertolt was already there with a reassuring smile.

Eren and Levi ducked into the darkness that was clinging to the walls and luckily they survived the entire way through the crowd and slipped into what Eren assumed was backstage. There, in the small room, three men turned to face them and Eren knew every one of their names.

Oluo – the older looking man in the corner, who was the drummer. Eren had actually met him before for a quick autograph one time when they played downtown at the Rose Bar. He was, generally, a comedy relief for the band and looked up to Levi's talents. When they were deciding who would be backup vocals, Oluo was royally pissed that it turned out to be Gunther instead, who is also the main guitarist. The other guitarist is Eld, who was sitting beside Gunther. They all looked like they were deep in conversation until Levi and Eren had walked in.

Finally, Oluo spoke up, "Why're you bringing a fan back here?"

To which Levi retorted, "Mind your own business."

Gunther whistled and shared a laugh with Eld. It wouldn't have taken a genius to figure out that Levi was in an irritable mood, and Eren seemed to have realized it all too well. With a tight grasp on Eren's wrist, Levi yanked the brunette past the band members teasing and catcalling him. He was meant to ignore it, but Eren was blushing a deep shade of maroon by the time they had finally waltzed into an isolated room and Levi slammed the door behind them.

He looked up to those emerald eyes as the silence fell around them.

"What do you want to talk about?" Eren questioned with a strained voice.

He was nervous, and so was Levi – even if it didn't show in the slightest. Levi had no clue what he wanted to talk about. All he knew was he wanted to tell the kid something along the lines of: _get the fuck out of my head._

"I've been thinking about you all day," Levi met his thoughts on even ground and _wanted_ to smile when a semi-shocked expression came upon Eren's face, but now wasn't the time and he wasn't finished. "I can't get you out of my head and it pisses me off."

"Why do you think that is?" Eren couldn't help but to ask with a smile.

Even his smile pissed Levi off right now. Eren really had no idea what he was doing to him right now – to tease him with something he can't have.

"_It's not like I __**want**__ to be alone!"_ Levi had screamed those words to Ymir that day. It was the last time he had cried. Right about now, he wanted to shout something just like that to Eren – something along those lines, something along the lines of how he spent all afternoon daydreaming about the brunette.

_Bitter, bitter, bitter_ – the word rang in his head. He was doomed to be alone.

"I don't," Levi started and crossed his arms when he failed to finish. "Forget it."

"_I just want to find someone who likes me for me – not just somebody who just wants to know what fucking a famous guy feels like."_ Levi and Zoe were close before, but he ran her off too. He ran everyone that he knew off. _"I never would have gotten into this if I knew this is who I'd be."_

"Stop running away from me, Levi." Eren's brows furrowed. "I want to know you."

Those words were a low blow and Eren didn't even know that the little voice in Levi's head rang: _Don't you __**dare**__ believe that – those __**lies**__; you've heard them __**all**__ before. _

"_Levi, I've been a psychologist for almost 5 years now and I can tell you this," Zoe smiled to him – a sweet smile that reminded him of everything his mother wasn't. "I've read you. You try too hard, you expect too much. You're let down at the end of the day."_

"_What else can I do?"_

"_Levi – Lance," She dared to speak his name before taking a hold onto both of his shoulders and forced him to face her. "Expectation is poison and you're not looking for the antidote." _

"I want to know you, too." Levi mused. Half of him was still lost in his thoughts.

_Get __**away**__ while you still can._

Eren smiled. "Then what are we waiting for?"

"Baudelaire Memorial Park," Levi stated without reason and earned a confused cock of the head from Eren. "Let's go to that park, I want to take you there – I want to get out of here."

_What are you __**doing**__? Don't open up to him! Don't go __**there**__!_

"O-okay." Eren shook his head. "Let's go then."

The walk was long and silent – for the most part. Eren could have sworn he heard Levi sniffle even just the slightest, but he didn't dare to question it. He couldn't even look over to the ravenette without feeling the tightest tension coil in his muscles. Even if he wanted to, Levi had his shades back on and his hood back up and the darkness of the night blurred out any potential effort.

After what felt like hours though, they found their way to the park. In the front was a large statue of Charles Baudelaire, and a poem underneath him, engraved in brass, that read:_ You always frightened me, Hermes the unknown, you who help me._

It was quite fitting, really.

"Why did you want to come here?" He asked as they stepped under the arch and entered the dimly lit park. It was cliché and average – flower gardens with benches and a small playground that had aged over the time.

"I always come here," Levi answered. "I just wanted someone to talk to, is all."

"Talkative now?"

"It's in my nature."

Eren noted that, even if he was much aware of that already. Not that he minded.

"Why do you come here?" Eren dared to pry. "It's a… depressing place."

"When I was a kid," Levi said. "I went to school down the road from here, before they closed it down."

He droned Eren out as he came face to face with the dingy playground. Under that metal slide; the one that's rusting and tinting a bit of orange – he could remembering _running_ from that school and from his home to go hiding underneath that slide.

_"Come back here, Lance!"_

_She never found me in the park – she never found me at all._

He wasn't sure if Eren was speaking anymore. He couldn't hear past his thoughts. All he could do was follow the trail he had always taken that led to the swing set, and he still gracefully slumped into one of the weathering swings.

_"You are disgusting, just like your father! You should be dead like him!"_

"Levi?" Eren's tone was concerned.

Blow after blow; he wasn't sure why he had come here. He didn't know why he came back here at all. This was supposed to be his sanctuary, but all it did was bring back the hurt he had tried to forget. It wasn't until now, with Eren, did he feel that hurt again.

"Le…vi…?"

He snapped back into reality again and faced those emeralds.

"Sorry," he muttered before shaking his head. Eren had opened his mouth to protest and pry, but when he had finally turned to face Levi again, the ravenette already had a cigarette between his lips and his head leaning against the chain of the swing. He figured it wasn't best to meddle.

"There's a lot of stars out." Eren rather said and smiled to Levi who had barely opened his eyes.

When Levi looked up, he remembered it all so clearly. The running, the bleeding. Falling onto his back in the middle of the park and looking up at the stars until he could feel as if he were floating – somewhere far, far away from here.

"There's not enough." Levi almost whispered.

The silence overcame them both. Levi, with a cigarette hanging loosely in his lips, kept his face towards the sky but his eyes closed. He looked deep in thought, or maybe just tired – Eren wasn't sure, and as much as he'd assume, he didn't want to assume. And Eren was carefully studying Levi. Everything from his abnormally long lashes, to his stubby nails, to the way that Levi stubbed the toe of his shoe into the sand and occasionally tapped his foot on the mound of sand before burrowing it again.

Habits, overlooked details – they all fascinated Eren when it came to Levi.

"Eren," Levi turned and left his cigarette ash to scatter from the movement. "Tell me what it is you want from me."

"Huh?"

"Do you want drugs, sex, parties or what? What do you want that I can give you? Why do you follow me when I ask you to? Just tell me so we can get this over with."

Eren was baffled. He couldn't even fully register the comment before he stuttered out, "Y-you."

Levi could laugh. "Me?"

"Just you." Eren shivered from the way Levi was glaring at him from the corner of his eye.

"You're a fucking shitty liar." Levi scowled before picking the cigarette butt from between his teeth and flicking it elsewhere. He stood and Eren's heart panged with despair – the moment was ending too quickly. "You're just like everyone else; I'm just a fucking curiosity to you."

"I'm not lying!" Eren rose with him and blocked him from exiting in his original path.

"Fuck you, get out of my way." Levi shoved the brunette aside with ease and stomped past him.

Eren recovered from the comment only partially; enough to stumble forward and grab the small wrist.

"Wait!" He yelped.

Levi spun on his heels to face the brunette, and unintentionally, with full regret in the very first second that he had balled his fist, he landed that said fist right onto Eren's pretty green eye.

There was a soft crack with the impact. At the moment, Levi wasn't sure from what; his fingers cracking, Eren's bone hitting his or Eren's back hitting the pavement. He wasn't even sure if Eren was conscious until after dragged on seconds that felt like hours, the brunette whimpered a noise that seemed caught between a sob and a hiss.

"Er-Eren I – _fuck_…" Levi breathed just barely.

Eren sat up slowly with his head in his hand. Those green eyes peeked past chocolate bangs, and underneath his eye, just barely on the tip of his cheek bone there was already a swelling of pink.

"Eren just –" He gripped his hair and cursed to himself quietly. "Just stay away from me."

"_As if I'd want some fucked up lunatic to be mine forever." _The words rang again, and the angry expression on Eren's face seemed to be saying just that. With another silent curse, Levi turned and made his original walk out of the park extremely quicker than he planned.

He left Eren there.

And when he turned the corner, he pulled his phone out with a trembling and sore hand.

It rang three times before it answered, _"Hel –"_

"Gunther," Levi didn't allow the man time to speak. "Reschedule our flight out of here."

"_What? To when?"_

"Now – tonight. I _refuse_ to wake up in this town again."

"…_That's so sudden, though."_

"I don't care. Schedule mine separately if you have to, just get me a fucking plane."

There was silence on the other line before a sigh. _"Okay, I'll get you a ticket tonight. Meet us at the airport. We'll leave tonight."_

* * *

Author notes; **Quick question – do you guys like long chapters, or short?**

Anyway. Gosh, I worked on this chapter for a while. I stayed up until 4 in the morning to do my final exams and I ended up working on this chapter for about 2 hours before I finally had to get my work done. Besides that, this chapter took me about a week to piece together and write out. Damn my short attention span. And sorry about the sad of this chapter – it won't be sad forever though~

Also! Thanks to everyone who reviewed; I really do love waking up with reviews and I love to know that you guys are still enjoying the story. Some of your guesses were/are close, but not quite. I've got the next three chapters written out; I just gotta edit and post them. cx

Songs used:

Artic Monkeys – Only One Who Knows


	3. Chapter 3

LOL you guys I'm so sorry for the last chapter and breaking your hearts. I love you all, even if I torture you. c: Those of you who did comment; you all said you liked long chapters, so I hope this does well. Also, a fair warning – I have dyslexia and I write sentences backwards. Like, for example, if I mean to say: _The cat is in the tree. _I'll say: _The tree is in the cat_. It's embarrassing and dumb really but I noticed I did it a lot while writing this chapter – worse than I have ever done. Luckily, I corrected most of it, but if you notice more please let me know. s:

* * *

3

LeviEren  
Attack on Titan ; Rated M ; Yaoi ; Lemons  
I don't own or claim to own anything but the writing.

/ **Knee-Deep in the North Sea** /

"_You're disgusting, Lance! Look at the mess you made!"_

Levi cringed at his mother's voice and turned the showers tap to a hotter level. His skin was already blushing bright from head to toe. He wasn't crying intentionally, but the water burnt his skin, burned his eyes and every nerve on his body was rigged with pain.

"_Look at the fucking blood you got on my shoes! Clean them up __**right now**__." _

He didn't cringe because it hurt to remember; he cringed because he listened – he got on his hands and knees and scrubbed her shoes clean with his tattered shirt. He spent every waking moment of his childhood cleaning his own blood up from his mother's home, and when the beatings got worse, when the bleeding happened more often and made bigger messes – she left him in a hotel – a hotel room that she spent the night in with different men every night.

She made him watch.

She made him clean up her messes.

"Disgusting, disgusting, disgusting…" He quietly muttered like a mantra in rhythm with his scrubbing. If he were to apply even an ounce more of pressure, surely he'd cut the skin. But at this pressure, it was just the right amount to leave him with irritated rashes all over his body.

"_Papa, I don't want to live with her anymore."_

He sat in the shower for nearly 2 hours until the scolding hot water had turned ice cold, and he would have sat in their for longer if not for his phone constantly ringing utterly nonstop. It's not like he answered it though, and that's why he wasn't surprised when someone came beating on the hotel door.

His first thought was Eren – until he remembered he didn't even give Eren his number.

_And maybe that was for the best._

No, it was someone whose company he didn't want right now – Ymir. He could hear her screaming his name through the hotel before she came barging into the bedroom, panicking and stumbling through the hotel room until she practically kicked the bathroom door down and shouted, "Levi, you _fuck_!"

She crossed the bathroom and reached a hand out to the naked man, but withdrew it with a hiss when the freezing water stung her. Her worried expression changed to something far more venomous and her lips twisted into a snarl as she angrily twisted the knobs of the shower off and got a towel from underneath the sink.

Levi didn't make much of a move to stop her from wrapping a towel around him and lifting him out of the tub. He kept his eyes locked to the ground no matter how many times she huffed and cursed.

Finally, though, she held her hands on both sides of his face and forced him to look at her. If this would have been anyone else, they both knew she would have been put in the hospital in this very second – but it was Ymir, his cousin who was like a sister to him. He couldn't imagine hurting her, even if he very well knew that was exactly what he was doing.

"What are you thinking?" She whispered harshly. "Are you trying to get hypothermia?"

He didn't answer, as expected.

She sighed before dropping her hands and he looked back to the ground.

"You scared me half to death, Levi." She fidgeted with the towel a bit to make sure it covered his whole body and tucked it together so it wouldn't fall out of his shivering hands. "You didn't answer the phone and Gunther called me and told me what you said. I thought you tried to leave me again."

He didn't know how to interoperate that, so he remained silent while he glanced up at her, his eyes meaning to say _I'm sorry_.

"Come on, let's get you some clothes." She took a hold of his hand before noticing the red whelping on his knuckles. "What did you do to your hand? Levi – what _is_ all of this about? What's going on?"

He took his hand away and shrugged.

"We're getting you some clothes," she crossed her arms. "And then you _will_ tell me what is going on."

"I don't have the time. I'm leaving tonight."

"I don't care. You'll miss that plane for all I care – you're not leaving without telling me what's wrong."

"None of your business." He harshly retorted and brushed past her, into the bedroom and began rummaging through his clothes in the dresser. He quickly slid on some boxers while he knew Ymir was waiting in the bathroom for him to do just that. "I'm decent." He quickly added.

She came out with her arms still crossed and leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom to watch Levi tossing all of his clothes out onto the bed. He picked up an outfit; some black jeans and a simple white t-shirt with his leather jacket.

His pants were the first to go on. He knew even though Ymir had seen the damage on his legs numerous times, she still couldn't help but to stare with the same worried expression. Instead of making a comment of that, she mused, "Your tattoo looks like it's healing good."

He looked for himself while his pants were at his knees. It was a dumb tattoo to him, and he only got it to cover up what he had done to himself. It was an oversized wing with the tip starting at his hip, and covering his outer thigh until it ended about 3 inches before his knee. He hated it, but he hated the scars more. And while it didn't cover all of them it got the job done. It was the only tattoo he had besides the ones on his knuckles.

"Yeah," He simply replied before tugging up his jeans the rest of the way.

Ymir waited for him to pull his shirt on before reminding him, "So talk to me."

"I told you it was none of your business."

"Besides Krista, you're the only family I have and I'm the only family you have besides… well… I'm technically the only family you have, so talk to me about what's on your mind."

"No," Levi repeated and Ymir frowned in response. She glared at him, but her attempt to threaten him with said glare failed. "Creep." He added before sitting to the bed and pulling his boots on.

"Levi you're so fucking—" she paused, and halfway through lacing up his boots his breath hitched and his entire body stilled as he awaited for that impact; for that one word: _bitter_. "—stubborn." She finished and the word never came.

Content with her following silence, he finished lacing his boots before standing.

"It must be nice," Ymir's voice finally quivered. "To be so oblivious to everyone around you worrying."

"Don't start your crying now." Levi pinched the bridge of his nose before sighing.

She buried her face into the crook of her arm. "You're just running away again and leaving me behind and you won't even tell me why." Her words mixed together the deeper she got into her meaning; her voice slurred more as the tears came. "Y-you don't even call me when you leave, it's like you forg-get me and everything."

"I don't have time for this." He breathed with a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"You've never had time for me," she blubbered. "Even when I needed you, when my mother died – you just left me there! You left me in a hotel room while you went off and fucked strangers and got drunk, you're… y-you're—" She stammered a bit, obviously hesitating.

"Bitter?" Levi offered.

"Just like your mum!"

The blow was too low and she knew it. She knew that he knew. Still, she stomped out of the hotel room and left him there; motionless and staring forward at the spot that Ymir was standing at moments ago and hardly breathing. His ears rang from the sudden silence, and through his eyes it was like the entire room had turned black.

It only for seconds until his chest swelled and he heaved forward and onto his knees with a sudden intake of breath. Now he was trembling – his very bones were tremoring and his breathing was so unsteady he actually whimpered to take in oxygen. He hadn't felt this feeling in a long time; the feeling of utter failure and disappointment. The sadness and familiar hurt of his childhood. The feeling of _rage_ – seeing red and wanting more.

* * *

Eren picked up a job with Mikasa easily – even if it was only temporary.

"_It'll help you get back on your feet,"_ Mikasa's boss, Hannes, told Eren. _"Just don't leave your sister in debt by taking her tips."_

He promised he wouldn't and that he'd start looking for another job as soon as possible.

Armin was with them tonight, with Annie and her friends Reiner and Bertolt. Since Eren had already met Bertolt earlier, they skipped their introduction with a friendly smile and moved onto introducing Reiner who immediately asked, "What the fuck happened to your eye, man?"

Bertolt cocked his head before noticing the whelp as well. They both awaited his answer.

He chuckled nervously before lying, "I don't even remember. I got really drunk last night."

"Weren't you with Levi?" Bertolt offered.

"Yeah," he said. "We went backstage and drank with the guys. I dunno how I got home. I must have gotten into a bar fight or something because I'm completely sore."

Or maybe it was because he stayed awake at the park all night waiting for Levi to come back. Only when the sun rose and Eren realized he wasn't coming back did he hug himself all the way to the bar to find Mikasa and he told her the same exact lie. No one questioned him, but Bertolt didn't seem as convinced as Mikasa had. At least he wasn't threatening lives and trying to pry out of his arms like Mikasa had either.

"Well damn." Reiner barked a laugh. "You partied with a famous guy – how's it feel?"

"Okay I guess. He's just a normal guy." _Who kicked my ass down in one hit._

"Well I'm glad you're okay," Bertolt muttered.

"Thanks." He replied before looking to Armin. The blonde looked as if he didn't believe it at all; his brows furrowed and a frown plastered on his face. He broke gazes with Armin's curious and prying look and finally sighed. "I think I'm gonna take my break now – I'm gonna get some food, anyone want anything?"

Eren took note of everyone's orders and hurried out of the bar before pulling his phone from his pocket. As he was dialing the number for a cab, he couldn't help but notice the shadow walking closer to him – the same shadow that he had seen at the train station. The man with the hands stuffed in his pocket with his head down and a cigarette between his lips.

And he just walked right past him without even glancing.

"L-Levi!" Eren cursed himself. Why was he calling out? "Wait."

He reached his hand out and remembered what happened before. With a desperate groan, he retreated his hand and followed the figure. Levi wasn't stopping, if anything he only walked faster.

"Levi!" Eren called again, now curious.

In a small burst of anger, he pushed past the fear of getting hit again and lunged forward to take a hold of Levi's arm. Of course, it was snatched away. So Eren jogged in front of the man, blocking his path and held his hands flatly to Levi's chest to halt him.

"Move." Levi muffled past his cigarette.

Eren shook his head. "We need to talk."

"I don't want to talk." Levi responded quickly.

"I don't care – I want to talk to you." Eren repeated the words Levi had said.

"I can't talk right now."

"Why?"

Levi peeked from underneath his bangs. "I have a plane to catch."

Eren's breath hitched. "You're leaving?" Levi didn't respond, but the answer was obvious. "But… you have a couple more days and we just met – you can't leave now! We still need to talk."

"No," Levi nudged the brunette back. "I don't want to talk."

"…Fine." Eren softly admitted defeat. His eyes down casted again, rising guilt from the ravenette. "It wouldn't be the first time somebody walked out of my life like this." His voice was hauntingly quiet as he barely whispered the last of that sentence.

Eren's head fell before he stepped past Levi, and just as their shoulders barely brushed Levi turned and took hold of his arm tight enough to earn a wince, "Don't compare me to other people." Levi warned.

Eren looked back at the darkness that was Levi. "Why shouldn't I?"

"Because I'm not your father," Levi boldly stated and he observed the way Eren tensed. There was a flash of something in those green eyes – rage, anger, intimidation. "You were referring me to your father, weren't you?"

Eren didn't respond, only looked to the ground.

Levi adjusted slightly and felt relaxed now that the tables were turned, he changed the subject. "When was the last time you cried, Eren?"

"What?"

"Tell me when the last time you cried was."

Eren pondered it. The last time he cried was when Levi left him in the park, and before that in the elevator. He broke down in sobs, in self-hating cries and cursed himself. It was one of the worst feelings he had; but to tell Levi that?

"I don't know." He lied.

Levi saw through it. "You're lying."

"What does it matter?"

Levi let go of his arm and as the silence fell again, he ever so slowly began turning to face the brunette. Their eyes met for what felt like hours – just staring at one another in the darkness with nothing but a dim streetlight giving each other the silhouette outline of their complexion.

"I haven't cried in 8 years." Levi quietly admitted. His voice was firm and steady and that hurt Eren all the more. Was this going to be Levi's way of opening up? "I forget what it feels like to release those emotions. I don't know what it means to unbottle them."

"Why don't you cry?"

Levi found some kind of innocence in that; a kind that made him breathe out a wry laugh. "I can't."

"You can."

Levi shook his head. "I can't feel the sadness anymore. I don't know what it feels like… or maybe I'm so used to it and it's all I feel anymore – I don't really know anymore."

Levi grabbed the brunette's hand gently – a touch so fragile. He lifted it, and placed it over his chest. "Ball your first." He told Eren and while Eren gave him a look of confusion, Levi didn't say anymore until Eren complied. "Tighter." He added. Eren did so. "_Tighter_." He repeated. Eren tried, unable to tighten his fist anymore.

"I can't." Eren admitted.

"It's like that." Levi muttered.

Eren didn't understand yet he humored the ravenette with a soft, "Oh."

He moved his hand away from Eren's and expected Eren to do the same – but Eren kept his hand over Levi's chest, only moving to unball his fist and hold his palm flat to his chest. Through his hand he could feel the ravenette's soft heartbeat. It was slow paced, hardly moving and Eren couldn't exactly understand why he felt such a wave of sadness overcoming him.

"Eren," Levi brought Eren's attention back to his eyes. "I don't say this much, so don't expect it again." He said and Eren waited. "I'm sorry – for hitting you and tugging you around. I'm sorry I'm such a dick. I know it's not what you expected of me."

_Expectation is poison._

"S'okay." Eren mumbled, finally removing his hand.

"Eren," Levi called again, seeming to like saying the man's name. He drew a breath and watched those emerald eyes flickering to meet between his. Something simple danced on the tip of his tongue, something he didn't quite know how to say – something he had no right to say. "I'm sorry." He repeated instead.

Eren nodded before sadly muttering, "You should… go catch your plane."

Levi silently cursed. He completely forgot about the plane – and now, _damn it_. He had gotten himself attached again already. He found himself not wanting to go, not wanting to walk away from Eren again. If it weren't for Eren though, he could have already been on the plane…

"I have to ask you something before I go," Levi grabbed a hold of both Eren's arms and forced the space between them to be closed. With their eyes locked, Eren barely had time to nod before Levi began, "Tell me, if we were to become involved," Eren's heart skipped at the idea, "Tell me _how_ you'd love me; tell me what about me you love; tell me you can savor the taste of ash on my lips; tell me you can trust me when I'm away."

Eren drew a breath and Levi butted in, "Don't tell me now – tell me when I come back."

He nodded quickly and closed his mouth. When Levi backed away, a small wave of disappointment flowed through him.

"I have to go," Levi stuffed his hands back in his pocket and drew out his phone. "Give me your phone."

Eren pulled his out and handed it over and was more than confused when Levi handed Eren his phone. Levi stuffed Eren's phone into his own pocket, and encouraged Eren to do the same with his.

"I want my phone back when I come back," Levi said and answered the confused expression on Eren's face with, "We don't have time to exchange numbers – I have to go." He tugged his sleeve up and glanced at his watch before cursing. "I _really_ have to go."

Eren stammered and reached a hand out when Levi spun on his heels. But within just seconds the running ravenette was out of his vision and somewhere in the darkness much farther down the sidewalk than he was. With a frown twisted on his face, he looked down at Levi's phone. Of course the first instinct was curiosity – but what would Levi think of him if he just went through his phone? But Levi would surely go through his.

He grumbled quietly to himself before looking back to the bar and back to the iPhone. Instead of going through it, he flipped it over and looked at the back of it all scratched up and cracked. The screen had a small crack going right through the middle, Eren humorously noticed. You'd think someone like Levi would buy himself a new phone.

He rolled his eyes before going to stuff the phone away before it vibrated. Curiously, he turned the screen on and saw his own number on the screen; meaning Levi texted him. Before he checked the message, he added his own number under Levi's name to the contacts before checking the message.

_Levi  
You fucking brat, I missed my plane by a hair._

Eren smiled before responding: _So does that mean you're staying?_

Levi replied quickly: _No, I'm booking another ticket._

He sighed through his nose and replied: _Levi…_

Levi answered: _Yes?_

* * *

Levi had already gone through security and removed all of his piercings, stripped himself of his jacket and been questioned: "Why don't you have luggage?" to which he had no answer for. It was tedious. Now in line, he simply just needed to board his plane that was supposed to leave in 10 minutes and finish putting all of his piercings back in.

"Levi?" An unfamiliar voice called out to him and he turned around. It was a boy, a stranger with dirty blond hair. "Oh my God it is you!" The person quickly began rummaging through their suitcase and pulled out a pen and paper, offering it to him. He internally groaned as Eren's phone vibrated and he took the pen and paper.

"Oh God I'm such a huge fan!"

"Mhm," Levi hummed while signing his name. Eren's phone vibrated again and he desperately wanted to check it.

When he was done signing and taking a picture with the stranger, he quickly piled into the plane and found his seat, and now with nothing else to do, he pulled the phone out to check Eren's message.

It wasn't Eren.

It was Armin – he had no idea who he was.

_Armin  
Remember Ymir? She just came into the bar and I overheard her talking to Annie. Call me._

_Fuck_, he thought. What could have Ymir possibly said now?

He deleted the message instead of worrying about it and returned to checking Eren's message instead.

_Eren  
I know this is personal… but how many people have you been with? The question has just been on mind all day._

He tsked at Eren's warning; by now the brunette had right to ask anything he wanted. Quickly, he texted back: _What do you mean?_

Moments later Eren responded: _Sexually._

Well that message was no better. His heart panged – okay, it was extremely personal.

Even if it wasn't, it's not like he knew; though he pondered about it.

Most of it was a blur. He had a high school sweetheart, Isabel; he gave his virginity to her. That was one night he couldn't forget, back when he lived with his mother. He snuck her in and they made love. But after three years of their relationship, it ended when she had gotten into a car wreck. Since then, he had jumped from lover to lover, constantly getting ridiculed for his scars or height. One of the most ridiculous insults he got was, _"I just wanted to see if your dick matched your height."_

He quietly laughed at the memory.

Still, there was no telling. Ever since he was 17 he had more one night stands than he was sure there was population in their town. That's why being a rock star made it easy; the lovers came to him and left when their plane had to go. Their insults and curiosity meant nothing to him.

But never since Isabel had he truly fallen in love.

There was a time that he had thought he'd fallen in love with a man, but he only ended up being another crash and burn. That had been the time that he realized he couldn't love anymore – that he didn't want to waste his time starting over with romance again.

And yet, Eren made him feel…

The phone vibrated again: _Sorry, that was too personal._

_No_, he texted back. _You just won't like the answer._

_Oh_, was all Eren responded with.

And Levi dared to ask: _What about you?_

_2 people_, Eren said.

_Do I know them?_ Levi asked.

It took Eren longer than usual to respond with: _Probably not._

And all Levi could say was: _Good._

His lip curled at the jealousy and he took this as a sign to tell Eren goodnight. When he started to type out the text, Eren was calling him. Levi wasn't sure what for; if he had said something wrong or… maybe he had pried too far into Eren's life.

Either way, he whispered and ducked against the window, "I'm on the plane."

"_I know,"_ Eren sounded ecstatic. _"But I can't wait anymore."_

"Eager to talk to me?" Levi almost smiled.

"_Well, yeah, but I mean,"_ Eren stammered. _"I mean I can't wait for you to come back to tell you those things you asked. I have answers now and I want to tell you."_

"But it will be worth it more if I'm there."

"_But I realized just now, I don't care."_

Levi's heart panged. "What?"

"_I don't care about what you've done,"_ Eren had some hint of apology in his voice. He must have heard the tenseness in Levi's voice. _"I just realized that I'm… really… jealous. I want to be with you right now. Ever since you asked me how I would treat you if we were involved I've been anxious to know what that feels like."_

"What, _what_, feels like?" Levi was playing stupid, if only Eren understood that.

"_Being with you."_ Eren admitted shamelessly. _"I've never in a million years thought I'd be here, right now, on the phone with you. I don't want to run you away and I don't want to miss this opportunity. To you, I'm just a stranger, but to me you've been my best friend for years."_

The line fell quiet.

"_And I lo –"_

"Eren." Levi cut him off; his whisper turning harsher. "Don't you **dare** say those words to me."

Levi could hear Eren huff, but complied with staying silent. Levi was fuming at the sheer thought of those words and he had the full nerve to hang up on Eren right now – and yet somewhere, Levi wanted to hear them. He could imagine Eren saying them; he could hear his voice saying it a million times. But he couldn't feel his heart skip a beat like he knew it would if he were to say it. It was conflicting.

And so he finished the call with, "At least not until I get back."

Quickly, he hung up before he could hear Eren's reaction.

He stared at the black screen for seconds before finally cracking half the smile that he had wanted to smile ever since he saw Eren. But he was getting attached – and that made his smile fade just as quickly as it came. Eren would leave, just like everyone else; Levi was sure of that. Now the only problem is, Levi is too attached to leave Eren before Eren leaves him... and Eren will find out, ridicule him.

He tried to imagine those emerald eyes staring at him with disgust, saying things that he couldn't imagine Eren to ever say. It made his heart hurt, and with that, he turned the phone off as directed by the flight attendant and laid his head against the window as the plane began to take off.

If he could have done tonight over, he would have stayed with Eren. He only realized that a little too late when the plane was finally in the sky and their little town was behind.

* * *

Eren walked home this night and had never been happier to be in his own apartment, rolling over in his own bed.

He laid Levi's phone under his pillow and didn't even bother to strip out of his clothes before closing his eyes and praying for one good night of sleep. He still smelled lightly of Levi; leather, cigarettes and spice – it was undoubtedly intoxicating and the only thing left dancing on Eren's mind now is what Levi's lips taste like. Like cigarettes, sure – _but what else?_ His mind kept pondering the question. What else could Levi possibly taste like?

It was a thought worth dozing off to.

_Brrr. Brrr. Brrr._

Almost.

Eren sat up with a groan and pulled the phone out from underneath his pillow. He answered the call with closed eyes and sleepily asked, "Hello?"

The line was quiet before there came a female voice, _"Levi?"_

Eren's eyes shot wide. He pulled the phone back to observe the name: Ymir.

He put the phone back to his ear, "No, it's Eren."

"…_Well where's Levi?"_

"On his plane – he left me his phone."

"…_Why would he do that?"_

"Because he has mine."

"_Alright… well if you say so."_ She sounded wary_. "Are you alone?"_

"Yeah… why?"

"_Can I ask you something?"_ She hesitantly asked and Eren hummed in response. _"Is Levi okay?"_

"Why don't you ask him?" He knew it wasn't his place to gossip.

"_Because you have his phone,"_ she partially sneered. _"I said something to him – did he tell you?"_

"Levi doesn't tell me anything." Eren admitted.

She hummed in agreement. _"That makes two of us."_

"Well what did you say?" Eren asked as he fully sat up, completely curious now.

"_I don't want to talk about it."_ She answered.

"Jeez, it runs in the family." Eren sighed at her laughter.

"_Hey Eren,"_ she called softly. Again, he hummed a response. _"Are you and Levi going to be… involved?"_

He felt his face heating at the question. "I don't know." He said with a slight pout. "I don't think he really… wants to be with me."

She barked a laugh. "_He left you with his phone. I've never even _touched_ his phone."_

The thought was flattering, still he answered, "I dunno."

"_Well,"_ she sighed. _"Whatever you guys do, just take care of him." _She said and the line fell quiet before she added, _"Eren – did you ever read the article about Levi going to and getting out of rehab?"_

His heart throbbed. "Yeah."

"_So you understand what you're getting into?" _

"Yeah." He softly repeated.

"_So don't act surprised when he goes off doing some stupid shit, because he does that a lot."_

"I won't." Eren admitted. As the line fell quiet again, Eren hurried to tell her he had to go, and they hung up with a simple goodbye. The question was a good question – _did he know what he was getting into?_ But now wasn't the time to answer that. He came to realize this wasn't going to be some high school drama; this is going to be a real, broken person; and before he fell asleep, he swore to himself he wouldn't let anything ever hurt Levi again.

* * *

"Rise and shine." Mikasa said not-so-rise-and-shiney before ripping the sheets from Eren's sleeping body. The gesture had been enough to startle Eren awake, therefore reasoning why he nearly screamed like a girl when he came tumbling out of bed and fell onto the floor with a thud.

"What are you – how did you get in my house?!"

"I broke in," She crossed her arms. "You weren't answering your phone."

"God damn it." Eren cursed before standing on his wobbly legs. "I don't have my phone, I have Levi's."

"Why?" The golden question. "Ugh." She covered her nose and scowled. "Why do you smell like cigarettes?"

"We traded phones – and I don't know right now, I just woke up. Can't I get some coffee before my interrogation?"

She sighed before nodding and allowed him to brush past her. While he had made the coffee, she questioned him with every little thing from now, and the time he met Levi – which raised the question; _was it really that obvious?_

"Yes." Was Mikasa's answer to that. "Ever since you met him you've been acting weird. Is he treating you okay? Is he the one who hit you, because I told that short son of a bitch if he even hurt –"

"Wait," Eren cut her off. "Told him? You talked to him?"

Her brows furrowed. "Damn it."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing – I just told him to take care of you."

"Is that all you said?"

She adjusted her weight before crossing her arms. "Yes."

"You're lying." Eren closed the distance between them. "What did you say?"

"It doesn't matter," Mikasa's tone changed to a bit angry. "I came here to talk to you."

"About what?" Eren almost retorted.

"Armin." She said. "He's with that Annie girl." Mikasa spoke as Eren poured his coffee. "She wants him to go back to Canada with her, apparently her dad lives there and asked her to come home –"

Eren slammed the pot down, leaving his cup idly waiting as he crossed the room and closed the distance between them again. "When are they leaving?" He breathlessly asked.

She pulled back before answering, "Sometime tomorrow." Then the realization sunk in – it was written all over her face. "No, Eren! Don't go chasing after this guy, please; you're just going to get hurt again – you always jump for people," she spoke frantically as Eren was already rummaging through his apartment. "Eren!" She raised her voice to get his attention, and he snapped out of whatever panic he was in enough to look at her. "Please, Eren. Let one of them come to you for once."

* * *

"I'm not going to go crawling to him or anything," Levi flicked his cigarette into the ashtray before meeting eyes with Oluo again. "I'm going to let him come to me, if anything happens, I'm not held responsible."

"You're going to get attached," Oluo crossed. "You always do."

Levi placed his cigarette between his lips again before looking away, not having any further argument.

"Hey," Oluo caught his attention again. "What happened to your therapist, man? You shouldn't keep bottling this shit in."

"Zoe," Levi sighed. "Things got too personal."

"You fucked her?"

"_No_." Levi scowled. "She just couldn't… stand me anymore."

"Did she say that or are you assuming that?" Again, Levi looked away, not saying anything, leaving the older man to sigh and shake his head. "Man you've got to stop making these stories up in your head; people care about you more than you think." He got no response from Levi. "You're like a brother to me." He added and waited for something, but Levi only sat still with his mouth occupied with his cigarette. After seconds, he finally rose and left Levi alone.

He silently cursed to himself before pulling Eren's phone out. Eren hadn't texted him all morning and he had already swore to himself that he wouldn't be the first to text him, he'd let Eren come to him like he does everyone else. He was still stuck that Eren was nothing special.

Yet he broke, and quickly texted:_ We're going on stage in a few. Channel 14. Live._

_Eren  
Wouldn't miss it for the world._

Levi cracked a smile before tucking the phone back away.

"Levi," Gunther called from the doorway, earning the ravenette's attention. "Eld wasn't able to make it."

"What?" His smile faded. "Why the hell not?"

"Well you kind of made all of this last minute." He sighed. "His wife wouldn't tolerate it."

He tsked and quickly wondered if Eren would ever do something like that to him.

"Whatever, I can cover for him."

"Alright." Gunther forced a thin smile. "Good luck."

* * *

Eren ignored his sister's bickering while he placed Levi's phone on a charger and curled up on his sofa in front of the TV. Channel 14 – sure enough there was a news reporter recording _the famous Transgender_ playing live in Montreal, Canada.

"_The band is still backstage,"_ the reporter woman had a thick French accent. _"But we're going to catch every second live for all of our fans back home missing out on this show. Speaking of fans – look at this crowd!"_

The camera traced over the large crowd of cheering people, all freezing their asses off in an unheated dome. Eren couldn't help but smile in pity at the screen. How many times had he been one of those faces in that crowd, freezing his ass off just to get a glimpse of the band?

Too many, he decided was a good answer.

And then the band came out, the reporter went on babbling about them, _"And here comes the band now!"_ But the only one Eren was paying attention to was Levi, who was still halted behind the stage, barely in frame, with Eren's phone in his hand. When Levi tucked the phone back into his pocket and walked on stage, Eren heard the notification of a new text.

_Levi  
Try not to laugh._

Eren furrowed his brows, confused – until he looked at the screen again and saw Levi strapping a guitar over his shoulder.

He _tried_, oh he tried not to laugh, but the guitar was practically the size _of_ Levi!

He decided not to text the eldest back just yet, but just to watch the program silently with his hands tucked between his knees. It felt like some strange, surreal high school crush – it was almost creepy. He had never felt like this before.

And Levi had never wanted someone to _not_ watch him so badly. He was so nervous to mess up; it didn't show, but _god damn it_ he just couldn't get his fingers comfortable on these strings. Was this all because he knew Eren was watching him? Eren watched him a million times before – so why was he panicking _now_?

"_The mirror's image tells me it's home time, but I'm not finished 'cause you're not by my side. And as I arrived I thought I saw you leaving – carrying your shoes. Decided that once again I was just dreaming… of bumping into you."_

Eren quietly hummed to the slow tempo and more than happy that Mikasa had silenced and sat down next to him. They both realized that they were probably going to be late for work, but… well, what could you do?

"_Now it's three in the morning and I'm trying to change your mind. Left you multiple missed calls until my message you reply. Why'd you only call me when you're high? High, why'd you only call me when you're high?"_

Eren had always wondered if this song was particularly about anyone – or if any of their songs were about anyone; if Levi had written the songs about people he knew or if it was just some pointless lyrics to grab the attention of others. It was questions like this he needed to commit to memory.

"Eren," Mikasa broke the moment. He hummed in acknowledgment without looking away from the TV. "Why do you want to go chasing after him so badly?" He didn't answer. "Do you just want to fix him?" She asked before adding, "Or do you just want him to fix you?"

"_Somewhere darker, talking the same shite. I need a partner. Well, are you out tonight? Gets harder and harder to get you to listen. More I get through the gears. Incapable of making alright decisions and having bad ideas."_

"I don't need to be fixed," Eren crossed before hugging his legs and propping his chin to his knees. He was too caught up in watching the ravenette on stage and wondering if Levi was thinking of him, too.

"_Now it's three in the morning and I'm trying to change your mind. Left you multiple missed calls until my message you reply. Why'd you only call me when you're high? High, why'd you only call me when you're high?"_

Levi's phone rang again – a text message. Eren wasn't surprised that it was from someone other than Levi; he had gotten numerous calls and texts from people he didn't know and didn't bother to reply to any of them. Except this one caught his eye.

"_And I can't see you here wondering where am I? Sorta feels like I'm running out of time. I haven't found what I was hoping to find."_

_Petra  
Hey babe, I'm backstage. Let me know when you break from the band._

* * *

Author notes; Oh gosh here we go with the cliff hanger that brings drama. I have so much to write for the next chapter I'm excited to post it.

You guys know… if Levi always acted in character in fanfictions, it would be so, so hard to make a love story with that personality omg. So for the love of God don't tell me he's out of character I'M WORKING WITH WHAT I GOT LEVI IS A BITCH ILH BUT LORD

I also noticed some of you have been following me on Tumblr, so thank you. c: I'm sorry – I don't really post many things about my writing unless I'm asked about it. u –u I'm kind of a sad person also with sad posts, lolol. I try to post a few anime posts here and there too though, so I guess give me two points for that.

Q: Why is Ymir his cousin?  
A: I actually just thought they had similar eyes and he needed a cousin for this story. /shrugs

Q: Is Levi's mother alive?  
A: You'll see.

Q: How many chapters will there be?  
A: Anywhere from 15-40. I have no idea yet – it's really up to you guys.

Songs used:

Arctic Monkeys – Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?

I have a feeling I'm going to be using a few AM songs. I just imagine Levi being a lazy singer idk.


End file.
